We’re finally here at the finish line! After seven episodes, Marina Summers, Tia Kofi, La Grande Dame, and Hannah Conda have just this one final episode until they find out which one of them is going to be Queen of the Mothertucking World!
Let’s get right into it!
In the last episode, Hannah Conda finally got her first badge and sent America’s Scarlet Envy home. There’s very little time to feel sad at Scarlet’s elimination because all the girls are too excited to make it to the top four. And as previously noted in the previous episode, this time it really does feel like an international battle, unlike last season’s UK versus US fight.
But even the queens don’t have enough time to revel in their triumph because RuMail comes in implying that there’s going to be a reunion. And all of this is happening before the starting credits!
There’s no mini challenge or whatever as we immediately get into the reunion, with the eliminated queens back on the main stage. And yes personal bias very much on display but Marina looks gorgeous.
As for the reunion, CLEARLY the tension is between Scarlet and Hannah. Not only was it the most recent elimination, but Scarlet very clearly remembers how Hannah tried to get rid of her the week before and how at that point track record meant nothing to her. But when it was time to eliminate Scarlet again track record came into play. Oh my my, she really is the drama.
Gotta say, this reunion is quippier than literally all the previous ones I’ve watched! All girls seem ready with a one-liner delivered at just the right moment, from Marina’s “rocky road” jab at Tia to Tia’s numerous lines at almost everyone. But even with all of that it didn’t seem as heavy as other reunions? It felt more like friends teasing each other. The reunion is also where Arantxa Castilla-La Mancha got announced as Miss Congeniality! I thought there was going to be cash involved but I guess it’s only the winner who gets money!
The queens return to their runway in their finale extravaganza and the realy standout ones for me were Keta Minaj and her bone gown, Choriza’s Bettlejuic gown, and Scarlet Envy’s version of La Grande Dame’s condom dress from Drag Race France. And don’t anybody kill me but…I thought Marina’s finale dress wasn’t as impressive? Nothing really is going to top that Axel Que bangus gown.
Of course, before we get to the final lip sync we have the final critiques where the judges butter up the contestants so the audience can’t quite place who’s going to get to the top two. But of course we know that Marina isn’t going to win this. I’m just saying, RuPaul hasn’t crowned an Asian queen since Raja!
The Lip Synce Smackdown begins and it’s Marina versus Hannah Conda. I’m sorry but this is a set up. The moment Hannah put on the shades, it was over for Marina. This is like giving Morphine Megan Thee Stallion’s “Body” as a lip sync song. Marina’s fate has already been decided from the jump.
After seeing red for a brief moment there, it really was a great run for Marina, and as shown by Trixie Mattel pre-All Stars, it’s really how you run with whatever exposure you got on the show, whether you win the crown or not. Remember that Trixie was already pretty well established before she won the All Stars crown and that crown was just the final validation or something.
When Tia and La Grande Dame lip sync, the song is once again more of the Europeans’ speed, if you know what I mean? The producers really wanted to get Marina out of there. Anyway, Tia prevails and it’s a Tia versus Hannah finale.
I for sure thought that Hannah would win the lip sync because the song is Kylie’s, HELLO but to be honest the moment she brought in La Grande Dame to sing the French parts she had it in the bag. And of course, having Tia be the winner is more profitable for the producers in the long run because she would be easier to book for gigs in England than say, Marina, where you’d have to work on visas and shit.
Anyways, congratulations Tia Kofi! It’s been an amazing redemption journey!
Ron Does Stuff 
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