Ron Does Stuff

Yet another hectic day at work BUT goddamn it I am going to stick to daily blogging. I had quite a nice streak in the past couple of months but I’ve really been taking a beating lately in the work and health department. But I am recovering!

At the end of the last episode, we saw Agatha’s new coven head into the Witches’ Road, with the audience pretty much left in suspense as to what it is exactly the Witches’ Road does. But I’m sure this episode is going to give us some answers!

Pretty much most of the coven are quickly adapting to the new environment except for Mrs. Davies, and that’s because she really isn’t a witch and just someone Agatha roped along because she didn’t want to deal with all the lesbian tension between her and Rio Vidal.

Since Agatha is the only one in the group that’s ever walked down the Witches’ Road, the other members of the coven are asking her what lies ahead, and she unhelpfully tells them that they’re going to be tested on their magical skills, which is bad news for Jennifer since she’s magically bound and bad news for Mrs. Davies since she isn’t even a witch at all. THEN we find out that it’s not just Agatha who can’t hear Teen’s name, but the other witches as well. I don’t know if Mrs. Davies heard it because she hasn’t spoken up yet.

For a second, it looks like Agatha is going to lose control of the coven, but she manages to get them back in line with promises of getting their wishes fulfilled once they get to the end of the road. But while she’s doing that Mrs. Davies has wandered off the Road and almost got herself sucked into it. Here’s where we learn the first rule: Do not wander off the Road.

Then we see what I am assuming is the first stop on the Road — a beach house that obviously isn’t going to be a beach house. It’s fancy and I can’t wait to see what sort of horrifying thing the witches discover inside of it. Especially since they appear to be locked in with no way of getting out.

The house is the first trial of the Witches Road, and so far it seems to involve them drinking wine. But then Teen and Jen have a conversation as they look for a corkscrew to open the bottle of wine and it’s telegraphed pretty clearly that Teen is meant to be the son that Agatha sacrificed to get the Book of the Damned. At least that’s how I read it or I may have just been influenced by New Rockstars’ theory.

Mrs. Davies is the first one to down her glass of wine and can I just say that Debra Jo Rupp’s wine mom interpretation is so hilarious to me? Especially since I haven’t really watched her other stuff other than Wandavision.

Anyways, whatever the trial is going to be, it’s either going to take 30 minutes or is going to happen in 30 minutes, according to the timer that magically appears as soon as Mrs. Davies downs her glass of wine. And it looks like Agatha is planning to push everyone else under the bus as she discreetly gets rid of her wine without drinking it.

Meanwhile, Alice and Teen share a little bit about each other. Or more accurately, Alice shares a story of her mom making her get a protection tattoo on her arm at 13-years-old and then Teen cryptically saying that a lot happened to him when he was 13 as well.

THEN we find out what the wine is, as identified by Jen: alewife’s revenge. It’s going to kill them unless Jen brews an antidote in the allotted time, so the rest of the coven gets to work at finding the ingredients needed throughout the house. The Teen really wasn’t kidding when he said the Road was going to test their skills!

And then we get to the horror part of the show, as the witches start hallucinating. All of the hallucinations are terrifying, but of course the most impactful one is Agatha’s. I’m taking that as confirmation that she really did sacrifice her son to get the Darkhold.

Thankfully, Jen recalls the spell for the antidote and the coven mostly passes the first trial. “Mostly” because unfortunately, they forget to give Mrs. Davies the antidote and she ends up dead. Poor Mrs. Davies!