Ron Does Stuff

Back at it again with the gay Swedes! Let’s get into it!

At the end of the previous episode, we were definitely on the brink of some ghei happenings as Wilhelm had his hand on Simon’s mouth telling him to be quiet. They were already making gay googly eyes at each other before the end of the episode.

We don’t immediately get an answer to what happened between Wilhelm and Simon at the start of the second episode. Instead, we get to hear how it went for heterosexuals Nils and Madison. It’s a bit like a sanitized version of that boys and girls discussion from Kids?

Anyways, that discussion was so August could ask Wilhelm where he went off to on the night of the party, because he’s expecting that Wilhelm got his dick sucked. And maybe he did! It’s just that it wasn’t a girl who sucked him off! But we don’t get an answer from Wilhelm, at least not this early in the episode.

While we wait for an answer to what happened between Wilhelm and Simon, Felice is trying to get on top of that royal dick. Unfortunately, the royal dick that is sidling up to her is August and not Wilhelm, and I do genuinely feel bad for Felice. You deserve better royal dick! But then Felice is kind of a bitch to Sara so maybe she does deserve subpar dick.

All throughout the class Wilhelm is trying to start a conversation with Simon, and he finally gets an opportunity to do so when Simon doesn’t do as well as he thought with their math exam. I’m assuming its math because the teacher said that Simon’s calculations were correct but the answers were wrong which I really don’t understand but then again I failed a quarter of high school math so who am I to talk? Anyways, Wilhelm just gave more fuel to Simon’s socialist fire by telling him that the professor is more lenient to those who pay for private tutoring sessions.

Felice continues to have problems with her horse and Sara continues to help her with her horse and I just feel like this is going to be a mean girl storyline where Felice exploits Sara? I don’t know, this is my first time watching this show! I am just going with what decades of teen programming has made me expect.

Meanwhile, Wilhelm and Simon continue to be awkward with each other, with an added dose of August being a classist dick. But there’s also a really great tension between Simon and his friends. Simon wants to move on to a life outside of their province (state? I don’t know what they call it in Sweden) and you can see in the faces of his friends the question “Isn’t this enough?” I’m really happy that this show isn’t just exploring the friction between the rich and the poor but the conflict happening within those classes as well. Because Wilhelm definitely isn’t all about August.

You really know something happened between Simon and Wilhelm because Wilhelm’s searching for Simon’s Instagram account and looking through the pictures but then August enters Wilhelm’s room and is being an absolute dick. He’s commandeered Wilhelm’s phone and I just hate it when people do that. Like when Andy’s friends took her phone in The Devil Wears Prada.

Of course, the show has to make me feel bad by revealing that this is all that August has because his father killed himself and his mother shipped him off to this school. THANKS A LOT SHOW. But even Wilhelm moves on from that when he sees that Simon is going jogging with August and the rest of the gang and I know that it’s colder in Sweden compared here to the tropics but I winced a little with Wilhelm just putting on his clothes to go out without even showering or freshening up a little. Which is probably fine because it’s cold there and they probably don’t sweat much but the tropical instinct!

Another thing that we find out is that August hasn’t paid Simon yet for the booze — typical rich person thing to do! — and is probably addicted to pills. Ritalin, maybe? Or at least something prescribed for ADHD. He tries to con himself some pills by getting the school counselor to assess him as having ADHD but that doesn’t work out. Also pay Simon what you owe him, you dick! And then he finds out that Sara has ADHD after being a total dick to Simon and you just know he’s going to try and get drugs from her.

That’s something I’ll have to worry about later because Wilhelm is skipping rowing practice with August to go to the football game of Simon’s friend. There’s a scene where Wilhelm doesn’t know how to pay the bus fare and literally the same thing happened to me the first time I ever tried to get on a public bus in Singapore.

Simon brings Wilhelm to the football game and his friend Ayub immediately clocks Simon’s crush on him. Wilhelm has a nice time at the football game and then they ride motorcycles with Simon’s friends Ayub and Rosh and they’re touching their hands from two different motorcycles? I know I’m describing it wrong but I’m screaming while I’m typing this.

Then the show has to bring my good mood down by having August suddenly be a stickler for the rules because Wilhelm is spending time with the “wrong” kind of people. And he even makes it seem like Simon was just using Wilhelm for clout. I don’t know yet if that’s the case but even if it was, pot, kettle, both black.

Back at his home, Simon is really happy about the time he’s spent with Wilhelm and he’s even giving that “people change” spiel when Sara points out that he said it’s impossible to make friends with people on Wilhelm’s level. Simon is down bad. And then Wilhelm tells him to delete the Instagram Story with him and even as an ancient homosexual I felt that pain.

The next day, August is accosted by the school headmaster about unpaid tuition and bitch. So is August actually one of the poors? So there’s some projection going on there. Oh I wonder how you’re going to get your comeuppance. Also does that mean you won’t be able to pay Simon for the booze? PAY HIM FOR THE BOOZE. But of course he not only doesn’t pay for the booze but convinces Simon to get him Vyvase with the promise that he’ll pay him double. HE WON’T PAY YOU SIMON HE’S A POOR TOO.

Simon makes the poor decision to steal pills from his dad — what if that’s essential medication for your dad I am now aware of these things as an old person! — and when he asks for payment August distracts him by extolling him as a paragon of class mobility to the other rich kids and Simon don’t fall for this, I beg. ASK FOR YOUR MONEY BACK.

It’s something that Simon will have to think about another day because we’re at Felice’s movie night and Wilhelm is trying to get Simon to hold his hand and they do it in the dark and I am fucking screaming. This malicious gay faggotry has to stop!

However, it ends up being a little too intense for Wilhelm, especially when he notices Sara looking at their hands, and he walks out of the room. Hes really shook up about this and I think he even gets an anxiety attack? He has to open a window in his room, at least. Simon looks for him and kisses him and I scream and then he kisses him again and GAWD.

Wilhelm tries to tell Simon that he’s not gay — I’m filling in the blanks for him here — but what ends up happening is them kissing again. And can I just say how beautifully this was shot and how good Omar and Edvin are in this scene? Omar’s shoulders while he waits for what Edvin’s going to do next? The uncertainty in Edvin’s eyes? Simon shaking his head as Edvin pulls him closer? The closeups with Omar and Edvin’s faces close to each other? I’m dying.