Ron Does Stuff

It’s the grand finale let’s jump right in!

Zymba bid goodbye to the competition in the previous episode, and now we have our top four: Maxie, Angel, Khianna, and Tita Baby. But there’s not going to be a post-elimination get-together as we immediately jump into the returning queens!

And you know what? They all look great! Yudipota, Popstar Bench, and Myx Chanel’s outfits were ones I particularly liked. But these whores are immediately overshadowed because Mama Pao is performing? Oh my god?

Well, it wasn’t so much a performance as Mama Pao just walking around. But it’s certainly in line with a RuPaul performance on the main Drag Race show!

Actually, scratch that. Mama Pao may not have lip synced but she did get thrown around a bit and I don’t think Ru could do that. And Mama Pao performed with the queens!

WOAH WAIT A SEC WAS THIS FILMED RECENTLY? Because Kaladkaren only got married last September? What is this???

Anyways, the top four will be presenting three grand finale extravaganza looks tonight so this should be exciting! The first look is an elevated version of their first time in drag. Angel is up first and bitch is serving body for her first look. BUT, it’s not as impressive from the back, gotta say.

Khianna does a stepped-up version of the mummy outfit she did during her first drag competition and while it is an improvement, it’s still a bit meh to me? But once again, I am not a fashion person so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

I liked the outfits of Maxie and Tita Baby more, but I thought that they weren’t as impressive as some of the looks they’ve served before? That’s just me!

The second runway theme is a showcase of Philippine art and culture and Angel chose to take her inspiration from an artist named Paul Dimalanta, who I unfortunately do not know. But I wish main Drag Race also had this theme every once in a while where the queens have to reference artists in the American canon.

Khhianna, meanwhile, comes in wearing a gown inspired by suhelya and banig and shame on me for only thinking of painters. Of course crafts like these are representative of Philippine culture and also come with an artistry of their own.

Maxie’s outfit is inspired by Lalahon, a Visayan diwata who can be seen in a number of local paintings, sculptures, and handicrafts. That’s cool and all but I couldn’t see what was Filipino about it other than her stating in the voice over that it’s inspired by Lalahon.

Lastly, Tita Baby walks in with a look inspired by an unfinished work by National Artist Cesar Legaspi and I wish I was cultured enough to know the reference so I could appreciate this look better. It’s a good look, but I feel like I would get the nuances better if I knew the reference.

The third and final runway look is best drag, and Angel walks in a spectacular and slinky gown that just hugs her body right. She’s followed by Khianna who walks in with a look that goes an entirely different direction than Angel’s. I know it’s a basic comparison but it’s like one of those Picasso paintings where none of the body parts are in the right place.

Maxie’s red look is okay but it would have looked so much better if she actually tightened the corset? It’s supposed to give her shape but it just looks boxy now. And Tita Baby’s spectacular finale look just makes it apparent that Maxie’s look didn’t quite deliver.

As the final challenge, the show will stage TITE, the Totally Impressive Talent show Extravaganza. To non-Filipinos, tite = cock. But before we get to the talent show, we need to name the Miss Congeniality and this year’s winner is…Versex. The gaggery and the goopery.

Angel is up first on the talent show and after a totally unhinged spiel that is just so Angel, we get a song and dance number that…well it was a song and dance performance. We get the interviews after Angel’s performance and…I dunno if I’m into the way they’ve arranged this finale. I dunno, there’s just something stunted about it. But Angel still charms like when she reprimanded her boyfriend for not telling her to suck his dick I CACKLED.

Khianna is up next and I kinda wish they didn’t film the queen’s interviews against a green screen? They couldn’t rent out even just a living room set or something? Anyways, while it’s a great performance with a lot of physicality, it’s not even the height of what Khianna can do. I’ve seen her perform live!

During the interview, Khianna breaks the heart of every Maxie/Khianna shipper because she’s not seeing a Maxie/Khianna relationship in the future. She also seems like she’s going to be in the final two because production’s managed to really tug at her heartstrings and make her cry by bringing up her family.

Maxie is up next and that Queen of the Universe experience is really doing her well because this is a good live singing performance. But if you really want to get the full Maxie experience, you have got to see her live because she really is a fun performer that will get you hyped up.

Then it’s Tita Baby’s turn and we get a fucking nose performance? I still don’t understand how she did it! It’s something that you have to see to believe!

We move on to the top two which is made up of…Khianna and Maxie! They’re going to lip sync to “Lipad ng Pangrap” by Angeline Quinto and Regine Velasquez and thank god they’re doing a Filipino song.

The song starts and I think Khianna was hobbled by her outfit choice because it really didn’t fit the song and the reveal felt out of place too. But how do we feel about Maxie getting an assist from Angel in this lip sync? Wasn’t this two against one? I dunno!

Of course, before we get to the crowning, we need to get a final walk from Captivating Katkat and THE FUCKING SHADE OF NOT SHOWING JIGGLY’S REACTION TO HER WALK. THOSE WHO KNOW, KNOW. AND THEN CAPTIVATING KATKAT OUTRIGHT SAYING MAYBE SHE SHOULD REPLACE JIGGLY ON THE JUDGING PANEL. AND JIGGLY NOT HAVING IT. I CAN’T.

Maxie wins, which isn’t really a surprise. Kinda anticlimactic actually after that little Captivating Katkat and Jiggly interaction.